(no subject)

[nestingdevil]

"Welcome to HT&T answering service. Unfortunately, the asshole you're trying to reach hasn't set up shit. Leave your name (or don't), your number, and whatever the Hell (ha ha!) message you want. We don't get paid enough for this."

Beep.

➥ Text | ➥ Message | ➥ Video | ➥ Action | ➥ Redial

Comments

[outrageon]

one where he's not allowed to kill me or be me. Or like generally plot against me. Because now hes my biggest fan! I know, it's genius.

it's not like the one Val wrote me.

im just taking the networking approach to getting things done

[nestingdevil]

see this is why i never have to worry about you do i. you know how this whole game is played. good job sweetheart

yeah well. sounds like lover boy's up and left. a shame. [Not.]

your ambitions always so nice to hear. keep it up. keep going until no one gets in your way

took your advice by the way. the dating one. still dont get it but seems to be the thing people around here understand

[outrageon]

only my best for you ☆

hes gone and so is the gold in my mouth. more room for new accessories

see i told you its fine. you just have to speak their language

who did you go out with?

1/2

[nestingdevil]

oh and are you the very best princess

yeah i suppose you do. just make sure they're fair huh?


ah well. do you you really want to know?

2/2

[nestingdevil]

[He waits. Holds it out. Seconds go by, a minute, two, three.]

[Gotta keep 'em wanting, right?]

you could say he's the brightest star hell's got the offer

[outrageon]

[Velvet, who dunked on Lucifer the first time they met:]

Angel?

[nestingdevil]

?? oh i know Angel's the best but i'm not talking about fame

morningstar

[outrageon]

[Velvet thinks harder...]

oh the dealmaker on the internet the other day?

[What was it he said he was? The devil from the bible?]

charlies dad??

1/2

[nestingdevil]

[Truth and its Door, Vel. You're killing him here.]

yeah sure we'll call him that

[He needs a second. Yeah, he is a Dad, isn't he?]

[First time for everything.]

thats the one. met her too. good kid. was workin too hard though

[Which ... why is she working that hard? Why are they working at all? Do they ... need money? Or is that just a thing?]

but eh i'm not exactly the type of guy you bring home to meet a family huh? probably best not to mention it

2/2

[nestingdevil]

got something called a speed dial. ha ! this place and its new technology. pretty amazing huh?

so how does it work? think i got it right the first time but

[outrageon]

god right its like she doesn't even know shes a princess. idk some peoples heaven is working though ig

idk id bring you home lol. but i'll keep your dirty devil secret for you

when i come around next i'll show you i have to show you the printer too anyway. and i'll teach you other stuff too

[nestingdevil]

her too huh ? tsk. whats it going to take to make these people understand ? is it really so hard? he was doing that thing

don't they know who theyre talking to?

yeah well. youre different. im pretty sure most people wouldn't make the same choice. can't blame em

woould be a good idea. we didnt have all this. suppose they didnt need it what with the state alchemists and all. eh

want me to grab somethin for the trouble?

[outrageon]

idk i dont get it its like the world was put in your hand when you were born!!! use it!!! ugh

mmmm
surprise me!!

i want to hang w you again anyway

[nestingdevil]

oi dont even get me started vel. these people here. i dont know what happened but it doesnt sit right with me. guess i should start teaching them huh ? their worth

i'll order something in. you ok with spice ?

[outrageon]

if anyone can teach them how to flaunt what theyve got it's you

you're such a great example~

and I'm GREAT with spice. Bring it on

[nestingdevil]

ehh we'll see about that. they're all pretty stubborn. itd be a whole lot easier if they just got it. ah well we'll get there

uh huh. keep up with that flattery princess and see where it gets ya hm ?

good. found this ghost pepper ice cream i wanna try. imp runnin the joint says its hotter than the flames of any hell. i wanna see if he's right

[outrageon]

if flattery's what you want I can give it to you ⋄

speaking of have i told you lately you're my favorite? Bring on that ice cream

[nestingdevil]

don't think i gotta spell it out for ya. i'll always take more 💖

yeah yeah sure. i'll get it for ya. thanks again by the way

[outrageon]

[Behind her screen, she is delighted by his use of emojis.]

then I'll keep it up for you, handsome

any time 💜💜💜