"Welcome to HT&T answering service. Unfortunately, the asshole you're trying to reach hasn't set up shit. Leave your name (or don't), your number, and whatever the Hell (ha ha!) message you want. We don't get paid enough for this."
Beep.
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1/2
yeah sure we'll call him that
[He needs a second. Yeah, he is a Dad, isn't he?]
[First time for everything.]
thats the one. met her too. good kid. was workin too hard though
[Which ... why is she working that hard? Why are they working at all? Do they ... need money? Or is that just a thing?]
but eh i'm not exactly the type of guy you bring home to meet a family huh? probably best not to mention it